Subway Gurl on the road

Over the weekend I took the bus down to Charlotte to visit my sisters and new niece. YES! I took the BUS to Charlotte! The ride actually wasn't that bad AND it was cheap! $60 round trip! Saved me a lot of muulah by not having to ship huge boxes to my sis for the baby! If ya'll ain't know about da Chinese buses, ya'll betta get up on it. Holleeeeeeer!

So, for those of you who unfortunately have to ride public transportation, like myself, you know that a bus ride can be just as bad if not WORSE than the train. Especially a loooong bus ride. Well, the journey down south was cool. My besty came along with me and we were prepared with sammiches, snacks and a big bottle of Moscato. So TRUST me we were good. Lots of giggling and silliness ensued.

We had a great time in North Cakalacky, but unfortunately our ride back up top had a lil drama. Apparently, the trip back to NY has more stops than we were aware of, so what started out as the two of us holding down 4 seats turned into 2, which was cool but some dusty wide chick decided she wanted to get on the bus with an attitude and try my bff! Now...for those of you who know me OR my bestie personally, you already know that's a big fat NO NO! But unfortunately, what tends to happen is that these big and/or ghetto chicks see us and assume we are soft. Guess again biotch!

So the chic gets on and tells my homie to move her seat up so she can sit down behind her when there was clearly tons of other open seats. But no, in the nastiest manner possible she makes this request. Little did she know my bestie (and myself) was born and raised in BK N.Y.! So of course my gurl pauses...looks up at her, then at me and slowly raises the seat a little. She asks her if that's enough. So the gurl says "no! well, if u raise the other seat I'll just sit over there. So again, to further annoy our dusty friend, she slowly raises the window seat and gives me that eye to get ready just in case we gotta whoop this chics ass. So I proceed to start talkin ish about why the hell we stoppin again, and where the hell are we anyway, and a bunch of other prissiness to further annoy the dusty broad. Then Dusty gets on her cell and calls her friend to hurry up because the bus is full.

At this point, my besty asks me to pass her the rest of the wine, (yes, we had another bottle for the ride back), which she proceeds to take to the head. So I'm just waiting for shit to pop off. Then I remembered I left my damn facial cleanser in my suitcase below the bus and since more people are gettin on they're probably just throwin bags all around. So I storm off the bus and of COURSE my damn $30 bottle of Ole Henricksen toner is damn there empty! OH HAY-ELL TO DA MUTHA F'N NO! I hop back on the bus and start to really bitch and complain & talk shit cuz I know dusty is listening and she's already annoyed. Her friend (who had a striking resemblance to spongebob, u know square top, skinny legs) finally gets on and she was bigger than dusty but was much nicer. My friends seat was back down so she asked if she needed her to raise it and spongebob said no that's ok. So then dusty says to Spongbob, "You want me to sit there?", and Spongebob says "no! calm down. Why are you yelling?"...Why? because Dusty was pissed that my homie still had her chair down and unfortunately it was resting up against spongebobs belly! lol! A few more minutes pass of me and my bff ignoring but saying annoying lil things to mess with Dusty (you kind of had to be there to get the full affect of how we were fucking with her) until she finally tells spongebob to get up and move further back. BYYYYE BITCH! HA HA! (yea, childish I know but she started it! It was only gonna get worse so someone had to move and it sure as hell wasn't gonna be us!)

Eventually, more people get on the bus so my best friend decides to just come sit next to me which is when I over hear Dusty say "Oh, now frick and frack wanna get up and move 5 minutes after I tried to sit there?"...I couldn't help but to LMAO! (because my sister calls people that all the time.) We called each other that for the rest of the ride with her mean ass sitting back there looking stupid and even more uncomfortable squeezed behind two more women who couldn't fit comfortably.

So basically, the moral of this story is this, if you have 'tude' right off the back, ain't nobody gonna go out of there way to be nice to you. Yes, we shouldn't have been holding down 4 seats but hell, the bus was half empty when we left Charlotte, and we really would've had no problem moving but it was all about her approach. For one, she probably thought my bff was alone and two, she just wanted to be mean and difficult and pick a fight, and maybe thought she'd be scared to stand up to her because of her size. Wrong! End of the day she was all bark and no bite. As long as she didn't put her hand on either of us or address us directly with an issue, we were all good. One more situation that would've ended VERY badly but thank God she chose otherwise.

Chinese bus info just in case anyone's interested:
www.gotobus.com
www.tigerbus.com